Andy and The Italians

 Andy did not like school much. He liked his teachers and his friends, but school was not something he got excited about, probably because he had to work hard to get decent grades. With this in mind, it came as a surprise to me that he wrote long letters home on his first deployment and that they were really humorous.

One of the funniest letters that Andy ever wrote described the time he spent at Camp White Horse, a military base occupied by Italians and Brits. Andy, during some kind of firefight, had fallen on his knee and split it open, requiring stitches. He was sent to Camp White Horse with his dog, Frank. He did have the option to return home with some mechanics, but he said the he did not "feel right about leaving all his friends".


Here is a list of what Andy said he had learned, up to that point:

1. "Sappy plates work
2. Hard back Humvees look bullet proof, but they are not, (Army has high speed Humvees that are bullet proof with A/C)
3. AK-42's and RPG's are inaccurate ( they are better off closing their eyes)
4. (The new one) Italians have no shame! i.e. going from the barracks to the shower room with nothing  but a cigar and shower shoes
5. The Italian and British female are all looking for an "American guy", so needless to say that when I go eat (by myself since there are only 9 other Americans here)  all the Italians sit next to me and the Brits fight for the closest chair, like musical chairs. So dinner conversation goes like this: After everyone sits down, I  say  "Bon Notte (that is good evening, in Italian) and then they say some thing that I DO NOT understand!!They giggle, I smile and nod my head and then slurp up another noodle.( I can barely understand the Brits as their accents are so thick you could cut it with a knife). This goes on until I am done. I then go outside and feed Frank. I placed my other animal friends with Marines and Italians. Frank and I then go home (escorted by the girls).They say "bonjorno" (good day) and leave, giggling. Then the Italian guys come over wearing Speedos (yes! Speedos!), shower shoes and cigars and feed me and Frank Heineken beer and cigars. (Frank likes Heineken beer but I cannot get him to hold a cigar in his mouth!) Frank and I go to bed about midnite and that is my evening"

There is a bit more to the letter, a paragraph about going for a check up but Frank having to wait outside....something about "cleanliness". It was a 6 page letter, unprecedented in the world of Andy!
I will have to share the story of his attempt at chicken farming in a future post.

Sheila

"There is nothing to be unhappy about" - Ace Nowacki

Ace's Mom: Andy at Camp Pendleton

Ace's Mom: Andy at Camp Pendleton: "Anyone who knew Andy will smile when they think of him, in fact, they probably laugh out loud! Along with his over- sized heart, Andy also h..."

Andy at Camp Pendleton

Anyone who knew Andy will smile when they think of him, in fact, they probably laugh out loud! Along with his over- sized heart, Andy also had an incredible sense of humor. He was known as the "morale officer" of his unit as he was the guy who took it upon himself to lift everyone's spirits. Good morale is almost as important as knowing how to shoot your weapon in the Corps and men like Andy, although they may not do things "by the book",  are the bedrock of their units.

 When Denis and I went to Chicago for the dedication of a memorial to those in the 2/24 who were killed in action in Iraq , we met more of the men who were with Andy on the last deployment. A young sergeant came up to me with a grin but also with tears in his eyes. He wanted to share a story with us, his experience with Andy. This sergeant was in charge of making sure that all the rooms were ready for inspection. He knocked on Andy's door. Andy told him to "come on in" and what greeted him made him stop dead in his tracks: Andy was sitting in a beach chair in his swim trunks with, of course, his shades on. The chair was on a beige shag rug, simulating sand, with a beach umbrella shading his Irish skin from the room's light fixture. Andy had a "drink" in a special cup in his hand and next to him on the wall was a poster of a "babe" in a bikini, completing his beach scene. He handed a "tiki" cup to the Sergeant and told him that he would need to have that designated cup in hand whenever he entered the room. The Sergeant, after taking it all in, accepted that "tiki" cup. He took one last, horrified gaze at what  Andy  had created, and said, "Dude, you are in so much trouble!" and then backed out of the room, closing the door behind him. The Sergeant, expected Andy to get reprimanded for what he had created, but he told us that Andy never got in trouble for his beach room.

I am sorry that I do not remember that Sergeant's name as this is one of the stories that I will never forget. It exemplifies Andy's spirit in the best possible way; uplifting others at his own expense although I know that Andy fed the joy in his soul by doing the little things, like sitting on a pretend beach with his friends.

I guess the moral to the story for me is that I need to do more for my friends and not self indulge.

Sheila

___________

"There is nothing to be unhappy about" ;-) Ace Nowacki

Freedom

Memorial Day always brings a lot of sorrow for us and many others. It is the nature of this holiday, one meant to honor our dead warriors, a time for sobering thoughts and reflections.


 Some people have asked what made Andy join the Marines. I think, initially, he had a great recruiter, but then it began to mean something very different.


Andy was at Camp Pendleton. For those who read this and do not know, Camp Pendleton is rather a God forsaken piece of real estate on the coast in California. California, historically, is rather notorious for it's liberal politics and protesters. One day, Andy and a group of his friends were either leaving the base or approaching it, when they spotted a group of protesters brandishing angry signs that were protesting the war and those who were fighting it. Natural instinct for the Marines was to confront and do battle with those carrying the signs. Andy, from what I was told, turned to his friends and said, "Hey, this is why we do what we do; so that they have freedom of speech". I paraphrase, since I was not there and only got this from another Marine. Andy got it. So many others will never get it.


I can write this because of men like Andy, Kevin, Paul, Noah, Dustin, Pete, Joel, Brian and so many more. They are our protectors, our defenders and I am very grateful for each and everyone of them.


"There is nothing to be unhappy about" ;-)  Ace

Memorials

The knock came on the door on a Saturday at dinner time. Everything about that short, horrendously life altering couple of minutes is forever etched in my mind, and it is as painful in a memory as it was in the reality. This was the day, February 26, 2005, that my life was changed forever by two men in green uniforms and solemn expressions. I am using the pronoun “I“ as this is about a mother’s loss, a primal pain that mirrors that pain of child birth, but unlike birth, the agony does not abate in a matter of hours, or days, but lasts for the rest of a mother’s life. Andy's father and brothers feel a great pain, as well, but I cannot speak for them here.

Andy “Ace” Nowacki was my youngest child and held a special place in my heart, a place that only the youngest can occupy when he is joyous, caring, compassionate and an imp, all rolled into one handsome human with bright blue eyes and a brilliant smile. He was the one  left at home when his older brothers went off to school and,  having been a mother for a while, knew that this precious time was to be savored; we hiked, we picnicked, we rode bikes, we read books and watched Bert&Ernie on Sesame Street. It was a time that the other two could not share as they were not ‘the youngest’. Andy and I retained that special bond into his adult life.

Andy is in my thoughts every day. We just had the Cleveland Police Memorial weekend, an event that Andy loved . We are now approaching Memorial Day, a time for remembrance. It is a difficult month for those who have lost their loved ones but it is also a time to resurrect the good memories and hold them close. 

Andy's cat, Elvis, is now rubbing his fuzzy head on the side of the computer. Do you think he knows that I am writing about our Ace?

"There is nothing to be unhappy about" - Andy "Ace" Nowacki

Andy

For a long time now, I have written off and on  my own personal thoughts about Andy and how to live without him. I decided that maybe the feelings and stories should be shared. Today is the day. The world did not end yesterday, as some predicted, so it seemed right to start something new today.

After six years, there are many folks of the mind that I should "get over it", "move on". Whatever the phrase of choice is, they all mean the same: we are uncomfortable with your grief. I can pretty much guarantee that anyone who mouths pat phrases such as those, have never had a significant loss in their lives. They will understand when they do experience a death that one does not "move on". What you really do is alter your reality to manage the gigantic hole in your life that was once filled with a person that you loved for 23 years. My way is to talk about Andy and tell his stories, stories of his extraordinary humor and his great regard for the well being and happiness of anyone he knew.

For those who have stumbled upon this blog, Andy is L Cpl Andrew "Ace" Nowacki, a  Marine who was killed in Babil Province, Iraq, February 25, 2005. Andy was the lead gunner in a humvee that was protecting a convoy. He was three weeks from coming home from his second deployment. Andy's death not only affected his family, but so many others in many different ways. I will attempt to capture Andy, those he has affected and still does affect along with how we cope with the pain of his loss.

"There is nothing to be unhappy about" ;-)'

Quoted by Andy Nowacki when he was asked why he always smiled.